Hello Parents, our clinical team at Paramount Health Directions in Denver, Colorado is excited about the services we are offering families. We offer family therapy, individual therapy for children and teens, couples therapy as well as psychological and medication evaluations. Thanks for visiting our blog, please come visit our office in Cherry Creek to see the helpful approach we offer parents and children.
In my work as a family therapist at Paramount Health Directions, I ask parents to consider themselves to be the “Executives” of a very important company. The company, or “system” is their family. In this system, parents are the “Executive Subsystem” and create the family’s culture, just as owners of companies do.
Consider this, what is your family’s culture regarding how conflicts is handled. How does the family offer general respect and taking responsibility for ones actions? Honesty, hard work, dependability ….all of these are part of a family’s culture. Just like if we were running a company, we always want to keep an eye on the norms and policies of or family system.
Rules and ritual (more on rituals later) help form and guide a systems culture. Parents determine “Family Rules” and the rewards (praise) and consequences associated with compliance. Because I a firm believer in structure, I tend to think that having clear and “real” rules is more important than an endless list of expectations. Obviously, having too few or unclear rules prevents the guidance of the desired family culture.
Parents, just what are your values and what culture are you trying to create within your family system. It’s your job to establish and maintain the family’s culture. Don’t expect the kiddos to do this for you.
I’ll write more on his in he future, but for right now I want to encourage our readers to establish 3 basic “Family Rules” that cover most issues. They may sound broad, but with the proper implementation, they cover most family interactions.
Bill Strong’s 3 Family Rules
1. We Are Kind To Each Other
2. We Are Honest
3. We Do Our Jobs
Post these rules in a common family area. Follow them and expect your children to do the same. Keep in mind that as parents we need to model what we expect. Kindness is number one for a reason. Let’s expect that from each other and our children.
I think you and you children will like the results!